The Kazehana QnA

1. Your first car: What was it’s name, color, make and model and what’s one good story about something ridiculous that happened in it? (e.g. my first car was named Pablo, burgundy ’78 vw bug. once swerved up a hill and ran over a neighbor’s lawn while driving high in a hail storm.)

My first car was a 2000 green Honda Civic EX, it was creatively named “My Car” for the purposes of this post because I was clever then and I am clever now. My Car once ran over a homeless man, well, more like his shopping cart knocking 70% of his earthly possession across a Wal Mart crosswalk (the other 30% being the rags he was wearing) (and his beard, I’m pretty sure that is where he kept his pets and possibly drug paraphernalia). My frantic 18 year old self got out of the car asking if he was okay (frantically) and he started yelling at me like A Looney Bin Escapee (because, he probably was and I am sure he would have lost his street cred if he hadn’t upheld the stereotype). I gave him $5, which seemed to calm him a bit, I jumped back into my car and drove off. That was the one and only time I have ever given anything to a homeless man. And that, ladies and more ladies (yup all 3 of you), is the episode that solidified my spot in hell. That and this blog post probably gave me bonus points, I’m sure.

2. Who was your first best friend and how did you get rid of them (or if you got dumped, how did they give you the shaft)? I’m talking grade school, people…I want the playground dirt.

When I was in about 4th grade my best friend was Melissa and we were “not friends anymore” because when you are in 4th grade that statement meant Serious Business. And boy did I mean it! I was so mad at her for calling me a bad name! The nerve! I thought we were friends! My teacher got concerned and finally asked me what happened with me and Melissa because we were such good friends. “Because… because she called me SASSY!” I believe were my exact words. And can you believe my teacher laughed out loud at my scrunched little face!? “You are sassy! You are the most sassy girl I know!” And then me and Melissa were friends again until she moved a year later, though the sass remains.

3. Once upon a time there was a world with no television; if you lived then, what the fuck would you have done to entertain yourself instead of hanging out in front of the tube?

Did baseball, basketball and soccer exist? I did a lot of that and coloring when I was a youngin’ and us kiddos got kicked out of the air conditioned house into the sweltering heat (I call child abuse).

4. What’s the most vivid dream you’ve had in the past week?

Unfortunately, most my dreams lack any memorable storyline or events. My subconscious isn’t cutting my conscience  on the good stuff. OccupyDreamSt coming to a pillow near me!

5. A Wookie, a Jawa and an Ewok steal a TIE fighter. Where the hell are they going?!

The bar. Those 3 get pretty rowdy with rednecks and the whole Space Beings Wanting to Probe and all, so the Wookkie, Jawa and Ewok thought it would be hilarious to give them a little scare. And likely a lifetime of free booze and billiards considering a bartender ain’t gonna hit up 3 dudes with a TIE fighter.
6. Revenge or PRE-venge?

Neither. I watched a Jet Li movie today and he was all about healthy competition and whatnot. On the other hand, if I had mad skills like Jet Li, I’d be all about that sword play! I’d be challenging mofo’s in public arenas and taking em down with the fanciful swordplay.

So there you have it, I was questioned and by golly I answered. Unfortunately, I’ve been out of the blogosphere for quite a time and the few people I read have already been tagged and answered questions so this particular strand of QNA is donezo!


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